Tuesday, November 14, 2017

HEARING -- HARASSMENT -- HOPE

HEARING AIDS

As often happens beginning when I first encountered Ronni Bennett’s writing at her blog  “Time Goes By”  eleven or so years ago, her words often prompt me to think about the topic or associated matters introduced.  Her subject (11/13/17) discussing hearing loss and using hearing aids prompted me to make this comment though edited which I’m sharing here in case readers didn’t see it there.   

I’ve long believed aids to sensory system losses should be regarded as a fundamental health care need.  We are the information our brain receives through our senses -- just as the ability to communicate in some form or another is vital to our well-being, whatever our physical state.   Our priorities seem not to recognize these facts until we begin to lose these abilities  at any age, though the older we become the more prone to their functional decline we are.

What that means is — eye care, including glasses ..... ear care and hearing ..... are two  senses of critical importance to our retaining  a healthy mental — cognitive status.    Maintaining this state holds special significance as we age -- our bodies start to reflect the wear and tear of living -- and the ability to communicate — hearing and speaking to express our needs, wants and feelings — becomes increasingly vital.

For many years, at least in earlier generations, people disdained wearing glasses and were often the butt of disparaging jokes i.e. called “four eyes” and other terms, just as many others with various disabilities were subjected to put-downs.   We seem to have become more accepting of glasses use, but many people are still too proud to use hearing aids, or are in denial they have hearing loss — often blaming others for not speaking clearly or loudly  enough.

Also, many with hearing loss, or those who communicate with them, don’t use the techniques needed to best enable their hearing with what residual hearing they have.  As a Speech-Language-Hearing Pathologist (retired now)  I have additionally provided services for individuals with hearing loss, some with their family members, and others — to best maximize hearing aid use and benefits.

The first thing to understand is that not all hearing loss is amenable to correction simply by amplification.   Purchasing amplifying hearing aids would obviously be of little benefit for some in that case.   Having hearing evaluated by a licensed and certified American Speech-Language-Hearing (ASHA) Audiologist who is trained to identify not only hearing loss types,  but also possible medical issues requiring further medical assessment is recommended,  as opposed to hearing assessments provided by some businesses simply testing and  selling hearing aids.

My experience has been that too many people expect hearing aid(s) will return their hearing to be exactly as it was before the loss.  Unfortunately, it’s not that simple.  Numerous factors come into play, and the brain processing of information that the ear mechanism receives with the help of the aid(s) must be relearned in the brain. 
(Darlene’s description in her TGB blog comment describing the challenge she’s had appreciating music again is an example of that process, though speech sounds are processed in different brain areas and are more amenable to intelligible adaptation.)

For the brain to best adapt to the hearing aided sounds -- the individual needs to wear the hearing aids over time.   All too often when my services were requested the hearing aid(s) had been spending most of their time in the drawer as others report in their TGB comments.  Also, the individual with hearing loss did not know how to compensate for the aid(s) short-comings, or what they needed to educate their friends and family to understand about how to best communicate with them.   Or, those same caring family didn’t pay attention to what was needed and my patient’s hope was they might listen if they had a professional explain it to them.

Attenuation issues are a common complaint with hearing aids.   Our brain has the ability to selectively focus on one speaker in a crowd while somewhat tuning out some of the crowd noise, for example.   Amplification simply turns up the volume on all sounds.   Aid users must learn through use and practice how to accommodate and adapt to making their aid(s) work best for them in all situations.     Considering our individual unique perceiving skills, doing so will vary to some extent for users depending on how they respond to the differing hearing situations they’re in, their hearing loss and possibly the type aid they have.

I note from what users have written in comments at TGB that the hearing aids promoted as having attenuation capabilities leave much to be desired.  This should be a cautionary tale to explore their limitations  with a competent professional before purchasing.

All that said, using hearing aids can be a godsend for those with hearing loss and those with whom they interact.    Given the technological knowledge and skills in this nation, high quality inexpensive hearing aids should be available to everyone with hearing loss who needs them.

  
HARASSMENT

Me too!   That exclamation supports what far too many individuals around the world experience.  Here in the U.S., the courageous outpouring of individuals revealing the pain and mental suffering they’ve experienced -- afraid to protest against those who have harassed, molested or physically assaulted them at some time during their life time.  

Nothing angers me more than those whose ignorance causes them to condemn individuals finally feeling able to safely identify their perpetrators, sometimes from decades earlier in their life.  I hear the condemners of those who have been violated disparage them by saying, “Why didn’t they come forward to report it immediately after it happened?” – therefore, they make the erroneous assumption the act, whatever it was, did not occur.

I can personally vouch for the fact that revealing having been harassed, been aware of others harassed, molested or groomed for assault and naming the perpetrator is as authentic in reporting whether doing so occurs immediately afterward, 77 years later, or on any given day in between!  That does allow that some effort can be made to authenticate the report.

In my case, I only recently learned the perpetrator of one of my unsolicited events was convicted twenty years later following other persons experience.  He had ascended to a high position in a trusted life-saving caregiving position by that time.  I have wondered how many unrevealed others there were in the interim following me and before them?  

Thought to be a first time offender and such a credit to society in his work position, I think he may have been released.  That has led me to wonder how many more since then?   I’ve concluded given what his age must be now, he must surely have expired or is physically harmless. 

Lest you ask, he has lived across country from me and I don’t intend to invest my time or money into tracking him down now.  Had I  known about all this years ago I most certainly would have contacted authorities there then.

I won't describe a number of my additional experiences, or that of others I know to be fact,  but a startling though minor one to me at the time was the occasion years ago I was waiting at a crowded crosswalk on a famed street in San Francisco, California and received an unsolicited buttocks grope – supposedly to be interpreted by the groper as a compliment, I gather, much as I’m told routinely occurs in Italy, possibly other select European cities and cultures.  Knowing what is harmless and what is not isn't always easily determined and can be learned by some too late. 


HOPE

Our Offender-in-Chief has hardly modeled morally desired behavior for persons in power based on documented reports of numerous instances in his adult life as he self-described..   Though this was known before his election, a minority of this nation’s electorate still voted for him – some, reported to be of strict but hypocritical religious moral beliefs, ironically, continue to support him.

There may be hope that his supporters are decreasing in numbers.  Desperation, due to increasing threats to his credibility and legitimacy, has motivated him to resort to his standard playbook of instigating distraction, deflection and attack, as usual, in such circumstances. 

He has enlisted his partisan appointee Attorney General (shades of Nixon/Mitchell) to pursue questionable accusations involving a foundation associated with the candidate who opposed him in last year’s election.  I’m left to wonder if the Russians are coming and/or the kitchen is beginning to get a mite too warm for him given investigations of him and his family.  .  





21 comments:

  1. If Trump has done anything at all positive, it might be that his election has been the straw that broke the camel's back so to speak when it comes to sexual harassment. The 'me too' movement had us all marinating in fact that victims are everywhere and that we can have each other's backs if we speak up. That some people try to dismiss abuse because a victim didn't speak up at the time it happened is being naive or deliberately obtuse.

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    1. What does that say about our culture tat it takes something like this to bring about long overdue justice?

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  2. I do anticipate that the more criminal elements of his life (and I am guessing there are many) may be prosecuted after he leaves office.

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    1. We can only hope so, if not before if wrong doing is determined. Since I think it’s all about personal gain for him, the most severe price to pay would be financial reduction to the level of the ordinary American.

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  3. I just read today that one of the women who has accused candidate Roy Moore of sexual molestation supported the candidacy of the current president.

    I was floored by that. I cannot wrap my brain around it at all.

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    1. That really is bizarre and beyond comprehension for me.

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  4. Me too. I get so angry when people say, "Why are they coming forward now and not when it happened?" Because we were not believed or were told not to make waves. Now with the openness and sheer numbers, we feel safe. Boy is it about time.

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    1. Let’s hope the freedom and safety to report personal violations is now permanent in our culture and not just a temporary flash-in-the-pan. Furthermore, violators/perpetrators will be held accountable.

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  5. Fortunately I have not encountered any issues with hearing. That doesn't mean that at age 76 I am immune to such but feel fortunate that my hearing is fine. There are many other things that aren't so fine.

    As to the harassment issue, it is so refreshing to see all these women coming forward and standing together in solidarity on this issue. It especially seems to run rampant among the rich and famous. Now they need to take the most important step and step up the prosecution and punishment of these offenders and that will go a long way in addressing sexual harassment.

    And as far as Trump goes, Mama always said if you can't say anything good about someone, then say nothing at all!

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    1. Glad to note hearing problems do not add to your other issues. We probably perceive rich and famous people are predominantly harassed because those individuals are the ones most likely to receive the press coverage. Lesser knowns or those not known at all, unless they accuse some public figure or sue them and it goes to court are never going to have their stories made public and most of us prefer not having the notoriety. We just want the harassment, molestation, assaults and rape to stop — to be able to report it, knowing the perpetrator will be held accountable — that we won’t lose our jobs, or be penalized, or have our professional advancement short-circuited.

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    2. I hadn't realised that adjusting to hearing aids can be a tricky business. My hearing is okay but my brother in law's hearing was affected by chemotherapy and he now uses hearing aids which he doesn't find at all satisfactory. I'm not sure if he's actually seen a hearing specialist as you suggest.

      I fully understand all the reasons why women don't report sexual harassment straightaway. But it seems to me that the only way to stop harassment for good is for every woman affected to report it. There would be such a torrent of complaints that men would have to change their behaviour.

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    3. Yes, adjusting to using hearing aids can be more challenging for some than others. The reasons can be different for each person, Your BIL might want to check with speech-language-hearing specialists where he lives as the organization is international. A speech reading class might help, also.

      Would that immediately reporting when harassment or worse occurs was so simple as you describe. These events can be highly emotional and psychologically disturbing occurrences for those assaulted and sometimes in those in whom they confide, too. I was a child in the situation I described so the adults in my life handled the matter in a manner they thought best at the time, not realizing the adult teen whose family and him were our friends would be a repeat offender — probably just becoming sneakier.

      Ideally, we should all hope that those who are violated can now come forward, confident they will not be subjected to retribution, and the offender will receive appropriate due. Education and awareness of all with this issue being brought into the light of day hopefully, will permanently make reporting safe. Time will tell.

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  6. Yes, our "offender in chief" asking Moore to not run would be the height of hypocrisy.

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    1. Well, Offender-in-Chief has no qualms questioning one of the other self-acknowledged offenders who happens to be in the opposition political party. So as the old saying goes, the pot calls the kettle black.

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  7. I know nothing about hearing aides, and appreciate what you had to say.

    I believe you read my recent post about my wife being blamed for an incident that occurred when she was a teacher and was sexually restrained by three boys and cut with a knife. People who say the victims should have complained at the time of the assault display their ignorance of the consequences of complaining to the victim, and if it's the victim that suffers today for complaining, it's fair to assume that she--or he--would have suffered a lot more decades ago.

    What's getting to me about these reports is that not everyone deserves air time. I heard a long interview (on NPR) yesterday of a woman who says she found Alfred Hitchcock to be sexually aggressive, Because Hitchcock is long dead, and therefore has no control over anyone, and no ability to present his side of the story, I was appalled that NPR was willing to cast a cloud over his memory, and equally appalled that they would so dilute the pain of people whose stories are relevant inasmuch as they concern men who are still in power. There will come a point at which the public will say enough already, and NPR's interview put us closer to that point.

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    1. Yes, I did read your account of your wife’s terrible experience. I can empathize with anyone who has had reason to fear their Iife is at risk. Glad she survived the ordeal, but I’m sure the after effects have been those no one would want.

      Determining who is publically featured in relation to alleged abuse accounts does require exercising some judgment. Discussing these alleged accounts associated with deceased individuals should not necessarily be considered unacceptable IMHO. I did not hear the NPR interview re Alfred Hitchcock, but what you describe i recall hearing about his behavior from other sources many years ago. I am unable to recall who was saying what, how much was speculation, but some was related to his proclivity for blonds — reports of the impression some of them had from their experiences with him. I was disappointed to hear that information about him then and would be today, but what is, is.

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    2. As I see it, the public is only capable of a certain amount of outrage until they grow uninterested and even callous in regard to a particular kind of story, at which point the news cycle moves on to yet another short-lived reporting fad (the POINT of the news media not being to report important news but to make money). To me, to make a man like Hitchcock newsworthy (as opposed to biographically worthy) is like talking about what went wrong with a car that was long since taken to the junkyard. As I listened to the story, I even wondered whose misadventures the program will feature next--Eisenhower, perhaps? The fact is that people who are alive are relevant to a degree that those who are dead are not because the living are still capable of doing damage. I also wonder how many stories it takes to justify ruining a man's career and relationships, and I really don't know. I do know that it's at least conceivable that a woman might lie in order to gain fame or wreak revenge for reasons having nothing to do with sexual impropriety, which means that I don't put a lot of credence into one's person's story, but when many people have come forward, I tend to believe that the man is the criminal that they say he is.

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    3. I believe, especially at this point in time, there is value in individuals — whatever their gender— coming forth to report the abuse to which they’ve been subjected whenever it occurred. The pervasiveness of this behavior through many years, generations, needs to be emphasized lest it be minimized and swept under the carpet after a little flurry. Exploitation of others by unscrupulous individuals and some who sensationalize serious matters exists for whatever reasons including by some questionable ones who identify themselves as being news dispensers As ever, the consumer/viewer/listener must exercise judgment about the value, veracity, legitimacy of the information and the source they choose to expose themself to and accept. Individual examples of contrary positions can usually be cited on most issues. Everyone is entitled to their own point of view and judgment.

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  8. Having spent my pre- and young-teen years in a moderately large city, most of the men who presented ill-advised sexual bents were strangers; but, I take delight in knowing that they are surely all dead by now - at least one, who was not a stranger, by at least 50 years.

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    1. My wife only reports three situations (involving a total of five men) in which she had to deal with sexually aggressive men, but I get the idea that, for some women, it's an ongoing problem. Why is this, do you think? I'm sure nationality and occupation partially accounts for the difference, but there are surely other reasons.

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    2. Ordinarily I might not post an Anonymous comment, or reply to it, but I make this exception. While Stranger-danger is an important cautionary admonition, typically offenders are known to their victims, are often trusted family friends, relatives, or authority figures.

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